theunpressuredclub | i confess i confess [glowverse]

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i confess i confess [glowverse]

Her shoulder had healed up well enough, although there would be some ugly scarring that would remain. The conversation with Lorraine, while not progressing much further that night, had opened up the door to equally careful conversations-- to a deep amount of thought, on Rachel's part.

Curled up beside Edgar now, his lips pressing softly against the cloth over her healed shoulder as they snuggle on the couch, she finds the words slipping out of their own accord. Doesn't doing anything to stop them, because she's finally started to recognize that maybe it's time to let it go.

"I know Drew-- thinks it's Papa," she murmurs, quite suddenly, "And it-- it is, sometimes. But it's usually... The bad ones, Ed, it's-- it's not him that does it. It's..."

And she can't quite work up the strength to actually name who it is, just yet. She needs to shift, settle more properly into his arms and tuck her head against his chest so she doesn't have to see the expression on his face.

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Non-rejection works well enough. Non-rejection is all he can expect for the moment, so he'll breathe into it and curl her back in tight against himself.

"Do they deserve this?"

It's a simple sort of question, maybe. It's one he has a strong feeling about--and one he suspects she has an easier, stronger feeling about than about herself.

The shake of her head is absolute instant, firm in its resolve.

"Of course not. So many of them are-- just kids or-- people who don't have-- anyone else who cares if they get-- stuck in this sort of thing."

"You care. You-- care if they get stuck. Right?"

He's not at all as subtle as his mother is with this sort of thing. He's probably never going to be. He's doing what he can with what he has.

"I care. If-- Andrew knew, or Argine knew-- if Mom knew-- they'd care."

She has to nod at that, admit it to be truth. It still won't stop her from sighing again.

"It's still-- us against her."

And all of the dangerous might Medea holds.

The Spades have taken a much harder tack in the changing times than all the rest of the Suits. There's no denying that the idea of taking a stand against Medea is a terrifying idea; the sort of thing people throw their morals to the wind to avoid.

"Our Queen would care." He's fully convicted in it. He's beyond convinced of it. "Our King would, too. And-- even without their own children, I-- I have to believe that the Hearts and the Diamonds would be on our side in this."

"I-- I don't know, Ed."

And that, perhaps, is one of the worse aspects of this entire situation: That her faith in others has been so drastically shaken by all that she's been forced to experience.

"D'you-- really think?"

"I do." He shifts slightly, pressing a firm kiss against her temple. "I know there's-- a lot we can't fight, Rach, but-- this isn't something that should be protected by tradition."

Particularly not at an institutional level.

The gentle kiss has her resurfacing from where she's buried in his chest. Has her pressing her forehead against his to try to meet his eyes.

It takes a breath before she's able to admit it.

"Y-yeah. You're... you're right."

This isn't something that should go on.

There can't help but be nervousness in him for this. His forehead presses hard against hers; his eyes flick between hers, searching and adoring and not yet certain she's truly on board.

"It won't be easy. And it-- it will be risky. But you won't have to do it alone."

"I just d-don't want more people to get h-hurt," she answers, voice cracking just a little with pain. There aren't tears in her eyes yet, but there's is a look of overwhelmed ache in them.

"It's... it's so bad already, Ed, having to--"

Having to experience it, yes. But more than that, having to watch-- having to see people she'd come to care for suffer and feel so entirely able to do anything to fix it.

"We're going to fight back."

He needs to bite back the hurt, yes. He needs to temper his desire to shout and shake. It's important; it's letting her feel safe enough to consider this, after all.

"It won't keep happening."

[ooc: b) I'm on mobile and typed "theunpressuredCUB" instead of CLUB and had emotes.]

"--Promise, Ed?"

She believes in him just enough to believe it if he promises.

It's not a promise he should make, of course. It's the sort of promise that might go wrong; the sort of promise that might fall apart in any number of ways.

But he believes in himself. He believes in the Deck. He believes in the men and women he loves.

The nod of his head is firm. "I promise."

She shouldn't believe him. She isn't certain she does, honestly. But she nods in response to his words regardless and nudges her nose against his a little desperately.

"A-all right."

"We're going to fix this."

She has to believe it. He has to believe it too. They have to breathe it in as the truth, noses bumping together and breath mingling in the quiet of these safe rooms.

"All right," she repeats.

She'll get to believing it. She's already starting to.

At the moment, though, she's finding it much more important that she seek out his lips with hers, murmurs the words reverently against them.

"I love you."

There's always something of a relief when she whispers that against his lips. There's always a better lift to his smile, even on nervous and exhausted days like this one.

"I love you-- so much, Rach."

It was destiny, yes, but that hasn't made it any less real.

"More'n anything, mon lion."

It's what helps her take these steps forward like this, slowly but surely.

"And nothing's ever going to change it. Nothing at all."

She has to know that that's real as well. She has to believe that as deeply as she believes they're going to make things change.

"I know."

This she trusts a little more, honestly. She believes in him-- in the glow that brought them more properly together.

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i confess i confess [glowverse]

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...I forget everyone who isn't Sean, Medea or Ophelia. :<

There was Horatio before Lindsey in Diamonds. I don't think we did the rest of that gen of royals :|

We should probably name them for reboot purposes. :|a

Indeed we should. Hmhmhm ::|a

I'll take Clubs if you take Hearts. :|a

A sound plan :|a

Arthur Perkins and Margaret Lacoste. :|a Plus also I feel like we don't have J & A whoops. :|a

...I will get back to that but a) was Arthur Perkins intentional. I've read an arthuriana with that.

I CAN USE THAT NAME AS MANY TIMES AS I WANT. B| also whyyy my heart ;;

OH RIGHT THAT WAS YOU I THOUGHT IT WAS FROM A BOOK but also yes bbs ;w;

I AM PRETTY PREDICTABLE REALLY. and i can't. /o\

I LOVE YOU ANYWAYS it is much feels /o\

PERFECT /o\ why so much all the time ;;

so much and so many ;w;

let's just have nice things /o\

we will get there /o\